


Hurtful kindness of a soulmate

by SugarMegane



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Female Harry Potter, Original Character(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-22
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-06-14 16:18:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15392622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SugarMegane/pseuds/SugarMegane
Summary: '...It burned. It burned so bad.If this is what a soulmate could do to you....Then she didn't want one.....'Harry returns to finish her last year at Hogwarts on the request of McGonagall. Whilst she is asked to act as a guide for other students that still can't forget last years tragic event, she finds that she has to work with the last person she wants to confront; Draco Malfoy.However, the student counselor seems set on having the two of them treat each other as friends. Was that even possible? And what's the counselor's deal anyway?





	1. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello this is my first fanfic.... not much more to say.  
> You should know that I read the books a long time ago so some minor details may be wrong. I've tried to google as much as possible to ensure as little non-canon as possible but, hey, this is my story so I set the rules :P
> 
> Oh and english is not my first language. Sorry in advance for incorrect grammars and spelling!

 

**[12 Grimmauld Place]**

  
Sunrays lit up the small room on the upper floor of Grimmauld Place 12. It was late August but the warmth of summer seemed yet to cling onto London and made sure that the last lights were enjoyed and savoured properly.  
The rays landed on a sofa and a table with bowls, two old newspapers, books, several empty cups with coffee stains dried on the sides of them, photo’s of a man with dark brown hair and striking grey eyes, a tree wand and a pair of glasses placed on top of the heap. I pile of blankets rested on of the sofa. A coat hung messily on big maroon armchair and the same armchair a were laid book were placed; the title read _‘Albus Dumbledore: The greatest wizard of our time’_ .  
  
Looking around, one would find that the room had been neat a long time ago. But today the room was untidy, with a large number of letters laying about. Most were unopened and all addressed to a _‘Miss Harry Potter, owner of Grimmauld Place 12’._

The few that were opened were from a selected few, mainly a _Ron Weasley_ and _Hermione Granger_. The ones yet to be read were from a multitude of different institutions  & newspapers; The New Ministry of Magic and the Daily Prophet would not get an answer too soon from the receiving party of these letters.

 

Everything was still and silent in the room, no, the entire house. Even the small house elf, Kreacher, didn’t seem to want to make a noise or disrupt the stillness.  
  
Suddenly the pile of blankets moved and shifted slightly on the sofa. An arm emerged from under the heap and reached for the glasses on the table near the sofa.

 

A girl sat up, with a tired sigh and blinked multiple times. Her short, black hair had traces of sleep in it and she yawned loudly, which effectively put an end to the stillness of this late afternoon in August.  
  
She stood up and stretched, feeling how the bones in her back cracked at the movement.  
“I really have to stop sleeping on the sofa” she mumbled to herself as she turned around and looked at the clock.  
_‘Already afternoon uh’_ she thought _‘I should make some kind of snack now that Kreacher is gone’_  
  
The house elf were allowed to go on errands now and then, as a way to give him more freedom. Although Harry had tried to give the elf an article of clothes it had been refused. Kreacher seemed to had grown fond of her after the Battle of Hogwarts… for what reason she didn’t fully understood.  
‘ _Maybe he pities me?’_ she thought dully as she walked to the kitchen. It was a strange thought but Kreacher had made sure to show her some kind of kindness and warmth at the strangest of times lately. After the battle, when all death were confirmed and Harry had to see Weasley mourn the passing of one of the twins, she had no time to rest and catch her breath before all manners of people were looking for her. They wanted to know more, get confirmation, find reason, look for guidance or just to talk to her.  
  
It had stressed her a lot before Shacklebolt approached her and almost ordered her to go to Grimmauld Place 12.  
  
“Since it is yours now” he had told her and chased away the most of papers and photographers. At that point Kreacher had made sure cover all windows, tidied the house and kept a respectful distance. Someone would maybe misinterpret the acts as avoidance but Harry knew better now. She knew so much better after one year in the house, with Kreacher preparing breakfast, tiding the messiest of the rooms and leaving things he found for her to look thought. The photos of Sirius were just one example, which almost had her crying after finding on her bed. Kreacher never mentioned it, only commented on it to be ‘ _a waste of good tears on no-good-Sirius Black’_ (which was the closest he would ever get say _‘please stop crying’_ ).  
  
The eggs in the frying pan sizzled pleasantly and reminded Harry how hungry she was. She slept past lunch so naturally she would be hungry. After she had fried the eggs and almost burnt a toast she sat down and looked at the papers. She had read the first page but fallen asleep in the room upstairs as she found that most of the articles were pretty boring. News of the number of dark wizards and witches that had been sent to Azkaban, entries of Quidditch and a lot of gossips and rumours about Minerva MacGonagall as new Headmistress of Hogwarts.  
  
She eyed the titles lazily, turned another page and froze.

McGonagall stared straight at the camera with the same piercing eyes she always had since Harry’s first day at the school. The title were printed in huge, dramatic letters;  
**  
Headmistress of Hogwarts looking for guidance**.

_After months of silence from the newly appointed Headmistress of Hogwarts she spoke up on the matter of the school security. In an official letter to the students and worried guardians she welcomed them to a new school year._  
“After last years tragic events and unauthorized usage of Dark Arts in the school it is more important than ever to give students a safe space for education and learning” the official message read. To the media she answered that she also wanted to make changes to the school that would help young wizards and witches to find support and confidence in one another.  
“I will assure you that all staff at Hogwarts have taken precautions and helped to clean out any dark magic in the school for the upcoming year. We have also opened up a new position, a student counselor, and appointed it to a teacher with the intent to teach a subject to help the students process last years events. ”  
She have not specified what precautions she spoke of but another source said she was “Looking forward to meet young Miss Potter again” and “to further discuss the matter and to look for guidance”

_…._

 

Harry didn’t have the energy to read the rest.  
  
Returning to Hogwarts had been a harder decision to make than she first thought. Many memories still lingered. She didn’t know if she had properly processed her feelings or was well enough for education right now. She found out through letters that her friends had the same feelings. Ron’s family had suffered a lot and Hermoine had to reverse her parents after obliviating them. They had fears, nightmares and worries just as she had…  
_‘I’m sorry I made you all suffer so much’_ she thought grimly. She often apologized to them, in letters and in her mind. It was just still so fresh, so incredibly heavy that she couldn’t handle it…  
  
Tears threatened to find their way to her eyes but she fought back.  
She had cried enough.  
… God how she wished her parents, Sirius or Lupin were here.  
But they were all gone now.

  
She breathed in and out evenly to maintain control of her feelings and closed her eyes, focused on what was before her.  
  
When she opened them again she found that her eyes met with the intense gaze of Headmistress McGonagall.  
She stared silently back at the older woman. Even if it was just an photo of the woman, she felt like the first time she saw the animagus; old eyes that had seen a lot and would see a lot. McGonagall was striving forward towards the future, seemingly unfazed by the critique and loud voices around her. The older witch was, in every sense of the word, strong.

 

“Master?”  
Harry jumped at the voice and breathed out.

“Merlin’s beard, Kreacher!” she half-shouted at the house elf.  
He looked at her with her usual glaring eyes.  
“Master is reading the papers again” he commented and walked closer to her, to the opposite side of the table she sat at. Harry looked down at the paper and sighed.  
“Just a little, but it wasn’t interesting”  
“Then, maybe Master have more interest in reading this” he said and a letter levitated towards her. She took it and eyed it from both sides. There were no name from the sender and no symbols indicating from were it was.  
“How do you know that the letter is for me, there are no name or address on it?”  
  
Kreacher was already on his way out from the kitchen when he answered.  
“Kreacher received it from a great person to whom Master should listen to” he said and walked out.  
  
At the last comment, Harry was now alone with this lone letter without a name. She stared at it for a moment and hesitantly looked at it.  
Somehow she could already feel who this _‘great person was’_.  
  
She glanced at the photo of McGonagall one last time before she opened and read the letter.


	2. Parallels

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not updating frequently. School really gets to me a lot and I personally have a lot of trouble with anxiety. So I canät really set a specific schedule for updates... sorry!
> 
> Also thank you for the compliments! I am very new so I thought I would get a notice regarding comments but I was wrong... Sorry again! But thank you <3 
> 
> So just some more text before we get to were the plot actually begin. I don't particularly like slow starts but I want to set up the setting correctly. 
> 
> Hope you have a great day/ night!

If Draco Malfoy had been unhappy with the situation before the war, then there was no words to describe the fear and anxiety of returning to the sight of final battle one year later.

 

Sitting alone in one of the coupé of the Hogwarts Express, utterly alone in his misery, gave him plenty of time to argue with himself. He debated, scolded and panicked in silence. No one was there to interrupt his thoughts…

 

He really, really, really regretted his and his mother’s decision.

 

 _‘No son of mine will be the first Malfoy without a proper education’_ his mother had told him with her head held high. Even after the war and with her husband in Azkaban, she stayed proud and stoic, like a proper pureblood would. Not that it mattered now, their family had lost all legitimate status along with the defeat of the Dark Lord…

 

 _‘God I really shouldn’t be here…’_ he thought as he watched some droplets of rain slide down the window. The day had begun with thunder and lightning. As the train had travelled further and further along the tracks, the storm intensified and heavy rain now hit the windows furiously. It fitted his mood perfectly and being left alone in the coupé didn’t bother him as much as it should have. Being alone to sulk for himself was actually quite what he wanted.

 

It was easier to feel pity for oneself without any dumb stares and accusing gazes following him everywhere…

 

But he had no choice in the end. When they received that letter from the headmistress his mother sealed his fate by replying personally to McGonagall. The school officially allowed his return to his studies, in accordance to the new school’s policy. That, and the fact that Minerva seemed keen to actually have him back as an example to other students, in case more would want a fresh start…

 

Not that it mattered. The mark on his inner left arm reminded him and everyone else, for all eternity, of his family’s mistake. He was doomed to be an outcast, until the day he died.

 

….

 

Draco realized that he almost hyperventilated, sweat streaming down his forehead and hands shacking.

 

_‘Damn it… just damn it all’_

 

He needed air. He stood up and opened the window, feeling how a cold sensation rushed over his face. It brought him comfort, feeling the chill of the rain as it hit him in the face.

 

It reminded him that he still lived.

 

* * *

 

Harry silently thanked McGonagall for allowing her and her friends to have their own, private coupé during he travel towards the site of the battle last year. With less curious eyes or questioning gazes, she could calm down and almost chat with her friends like normally… almost.

 

Hermione and Ron weren’t very talkative, just as herself. She couldn’t tell yet if she found it unpleasant of enjoyable; her friends’ presence were all that remained unchanged after all these years, so naturally she wanted to be able to chat with them. They had grown, yes, but now they were still Hermione and Ron, her two best friends.

 

That was her small comfort as she had been debating if she would return or not. That and the letter she received only two weeks ago…

 

_‘Dear Miss Potter,_

_I understand that you have yet to answer any of our letters. This is natural and to be expected, that is why I found that it would be easier to not write in any name or authority. Consequentially, this is a personal letter, from me to you._

_I understand that it would be a hard choice to return to Hogwarts after just one year. For your own good, I would like for you to consider Hogwarts as your home. That’s why you should have conflicted feelings about returning; last year’s loses and victories are still present here._

_That’s exactly why I beg for you to return this last time. I, and many others, are expecting your return and are happy to receive your opinion on the changes as well as help you in any task you have at hand, academically of personally._

_Please consider,_

_Minerva McGonagall’_

  
Such had the content of the letter been and she had to admit that it had been the final push that actually had her return. The fact that her old professor didn’t add any titles when writing her name had her baffled at first but was then reminded that this had been a very personal letter.

 

She watched as a couple of droplets raced down the window of the train. Had it really been one year since the battle? Yet, they sat her, all three of them on their way to finish their studies. While other students would never have the honour of even being given a choice.

 

She realized where her thought were and started to try to breathe more slowly.  
In and out, deep breathe.

 

“Mate, you okay?” the red haired man opposite to her asked.

 

She blinked and hesitated for a moment before she answered.

“Yes… I’m okay… Thanks...” she looked out again and could see from the corner of her eye how Hermione and Ron exchanged worried gazes with each other. She couldn’t tell them not to worry; lying to them would be impossible.

 

Instead she stood up and opened the window.  
“Just need so fresh air” she muttered and tried to let her thought’s be washed away by the rains.

 

* * *

 

As soon as they arrived, the trio were taken aside from the great fest. Instead, Hagrid had happily greeted them with open arms before taking them to the headmistress office.

 

The office had not changed much since last time Harry had been inside it, but she noted three things; the first was a portrait of man with black hair and an expressionless face, staring right at them as they entered. The second was the missing presence of Fawkes, Albus’ Pheonix.  


The third was the person who sat by the desk in front of them and wrote on parchments in great focus; Minerva McGonagall had not changed a day since Harry saw her last. Still dressed in her green, vide cloak and big pointy hat. Harry was again nostalgic of her first meeting with animagus.

 

As they walked in the woman looked up from the documents and put the feather pen aside.

“Welcome back” she said in her normal manner. Although her voice and tone seemed dry, the glint of relief in her eye betrayed her usual demeanour

“I hope the journey here went well”

“Yes it did professor” Ron mumbled nervously.

McGonagall sighed and looked at the tallest of the three.  
“You seem to be forgetting to address med as Headmistress, mister Weasley” she scolded him calmly.

“O-Of course, prof-… Headmistress” the red-haired man stuttered, a red started to dress his pale face as he muttered.

 

She looked them over, as if searching for something. After a moment of silence, she gestured them to move forward.  
“I must be honest and say that I am glad to see all three of you. The school as you’ve known it have changed… and so have many of the students.”  


“That’s why I wanted you three to come here… I want to here what you think of what I am about to tell you… and the other students waiting downstairs” she handed the three of them some papers.

  
“Most of the things have been easy, but some major changes have been done. Especially in regards of education and living spaces”

  
“Living spaces?” Harry looked at the Headmistress. Glasses met another pair of glasses and after a moment of hesitation, McGonagall found her voice again.  
“Yes, as you see, from this year forward, Hogwarts will no longer have the houses as manner of separating students. From now on, dorms will be divided year-wise and gender wise whilst the houses stay as a form of community for students when it comes to sports and other activities” she informed them, every word carefully chosen.

 

“Besides this, a position have been added to the school and a subject have been added to the curriculum; I believe the muggles call it a student counselor and professor Ragnarsson will also teach you in this new subject” the older witch said and paused to let the information sink in.

 

“Finally, we have a new professor in Defense Against the Dark Arts; Lyndon Sovydim is a skilled tutor and keen on helping the students get passed their traumas…”

 

“Uhm, professor McGonagall” Hermione said with caution. Harry could see hesitation in her eyes and how the woman debated of she should ask the question or not.

 

It seemed like an etirnety passed before the brunette found her voice again.

“… Will other students truly accept this? With all respect, certainly some students must have opinions upon this matter?”

 

The older witch sighed, but she seemed to have expected this kind of questions. She paused a moment before she reached for a parchment on her desk.

“Indeed Granger, would they?” she gave the girl a sharp gaze from behind her glasses “ This is why I would like to ask for your help with these matters…”

 

“This school is far from what it used to be, so thusly we have had to make many important decisions… Some which may or may not have a real, proper answer. We have only been able to hope for the best… ”

 

“And one of our hopes is that students may look past ones misteps, insecurities and wrongd doings. This takes a lot of healing as well as kindness and forgiveness…”

 

This was too much for them, Harry realized. There are too many unknown factors and many of the students were probably still hurting as it was.

“Headmistress, with all due respect, I think you expect too much from the students”

 

All three heads turned toward her and she found that she hadn’t said a word until now.  
“I mean, this is not something you simply forget…” she continued with her eyes fixed on the older witch.

 

Again silence fell upon ythe four magic users. The only sound at that moment were the light drizzle of the rain and a ticking of some kind of magical artefact in the office.

 

“I see your point, miss Potter… And that’s why I need your help. You see, while I do expect a lot from the students, they have seen some truly terrible things. Things no child should have to witness. That’s why I need you three to act up and show them the path.”

 

“They are insecure and looking for signs ord guidance. We have a school counselor but they will only do so much… What they need is someone who inspires them. Someone who shows them the way”

 

While Harry listened intently on the woman, she felt a shill going down her spine. She could not tell what it meant but she felt how a heavy burned seemed to be placed upon her shoulders.

 

 _‘Show your fellow students that forgiveness can be a matter of choice. ’_ McGonagall finished.

 

And with that, Harry found herself exit the headmistress office in silence, contemplating and anxiously feeling how her thoughts seemed to run in circles without any proper answers.

 

_What was she suppose to do?_

* * *

 

Draco had skipped the great feast and instead walked directly toward his bedroom. He found after he arrived that all his belongings were already placed neatly by one of the beds in the room.

 

McGonagall had already informed his mother and him of the new systems and allowed Draco a room for himself. He couldn’t guess for what reason she had arranged for that but he didn’t complain. He rather liked the loneliness.

 

He flung down and placed himself comfortably on his bed and stared up at the roof of cold stone. The wind outside from the storm seemed to scream at him in protest but Draco didn’t mind.

 

Instead he allowed his thought’s to wander.

 

And they wandered to the one person who seemed to have more responsibilities than him as of present; Harry Potter, The- Girl-Who- Lived.

 

_‘As a representative of a less desirable standing in the war, your son must find it within himself to forgive and ignore all kinds of negative interaction with Potter. We rather have him help her in the work of guiding younger students and aid her if such would be needed’_

 

Draco sighed as he thought of the letter the old witch had sent to them to comfort and lecture Draco even before the term had even begun. How would he be able to guide other students if he wasn’t even sure himself what he was doing here?

 

_What was he suppose to do?_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a bit more rushed I feel, but that is partially my fault. I don't like to write 'filler text' and got impatient... I hope you can forgive me! I've spent more time on later chapters!


End file.
